Fearfully and wonderfully made ♛

Grateful, overwhelmed, and confused all at the same time.

I don’t really know why I suddenly wanted to blog about my life. I honestly don’t know what got into me. Maybe it’s just that I had to let this all out.

Since the start of this year, 2012 has been doing good to me. Recently, I just passed DLSU-Manila’s college entrance exam with a course that I’m not sure why I placed that as my third choice. I know my first and second choices are the ones that I’m really considering to take up. But I think choosing that last-minute course has a purpose. Maybe if I never picked that one, I wouldn’t be able to pass DLSU. Or perhaps that course is the one that God wants me to be in. I really don’t know.

I also received great news today. I am so happy to know that I have maintained my quarterly ranking in school. :) School has been really stressful and all. But I am able to get through all those because of God. It is just so overwhelming of how great His love is. Indeed, He is my source of strength. I am not saying all these to brag. But all of these happenings in my life are real evidences of how amazing God works in my life. I may not understand some of the situations that He places me in, but I am sure that He just wants what’s best for me.

On the other note, what causes my confusion and anxiety the most is my choice of course and university. Yes, I do have my personal choices and reasons. But I feel like so many people are interrupting and dictating what is right to do regarding my decisions. I do consider their suggestions as well and try to think of myself being able to grasp topics which I do not have much interest on. Sometimes, I just feel like I am trying hard to fit myself in a course which I do not think that fits me.

Now, I don’t know what I really want anymore. The influences of others have piled up so much that I thought of pleasing them through trying out the courses that they want to different universities. When I got the results from some of the schools, the courses that I passed are so different from one another. I seriously don’t know what to do anymore. My mind is so messed up.

(Source: pandasteph)

Things to look forward to:

• JAM @ VCF Muntinlupa - I’m so excited to attend the youth service again with my classmates! Last week, 10 of us went to Movie Day. I really had an awesome time with them even though it was kinda bitin. I’m looking forward to having more companions with us on the next weeks!

• Sayawit - This August 25 & 26, my school will be joining another inter-school contest organized by the municipal government of San Pedro. I’m privileged to be representing my school again and I really hope that we’ll win. I know practices will be rigorous but I’m sure I’ll have a good time with my schoolmates as well. :)

• College Entrance Exams - I’m not really excited with this one but I should be starting to review diligently now that August is coming up. Honestly, I feel anxious about this. What if I won’t be able to prepare myself? What if I don’t get accepted in the college that I want to study at?

• More stress - Being a senior is all about stress. Plus, all the high school drama. Do I still need to elaborate on this?

(Source: pandasteph)

My blog is dead.

I know I haven’t been blogging lately and it’s all because of school. It’s been a month since my senior year started and I feel like it’s been a long time already. With all the activities, projects, and other school stuff, I barely had time to babble random things here in Tumblr. I missed blogging so much.

(Source: pandasteph)